I am pro, lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, queer, questioning, two-spirit, asexual, inter-sex, romantic/ sexual/ gender/ expression. I am so excited that we, as a society, are moving into a greater awareness of the different ways in which gender is expressed and that it can be fluid and non-binary. I am excited about and imagining ALL humans moving into a phase where we can accept people for who they are, how they present, who they love, how they love.
Liberation for all.
And I slipped.
The other day, I saw a little guy swaying his hips, using a high falsetto, saying: “I’m a sassy girl. I’m a sassy girl.” And at that moment, I froze with discomfort as my long-programmed subconscious mind took a moment to catch up. I am pro all love, gender, expression, and still, I felt uncomfortable with this little guy expressing a femme persona.
At that moment, I reflected. Turned inward. Asked myself, what is going on for you? What is making you feel so uncomfortable? Where is this learned response of discomfort coming from?
This is what I found, my values had not fully integrated. I still held subconscious beliefs I had been handed in my family of origin.
I was conditioned in a household that read the bible and attended church weekly. The only reason we didn’t have to go was if we had pink eye, diarrhea, or vomiting. The literal interpretation of the bible was what was used to inform decisions. My father attempted to get women to cover their heads because it stated that it should be so in the bible. Single versus were plucked out to ensure we understood that men shall not lie with men nor women with women.
So, I was indoctrinated into homophobia, transphobia. Anything that didn’t fit into the bible’s binary thinking was wrong.
I do not believe this interpretation of the bible. And still, uninstalling one program to upgrade to another takes time and awareness. I hadn’t realized how deep rooted this reaction was within me. AND I CAN CHANGE because I know where that reaction came from and I know what I value.
I VALUE: Humans expressing themselves in all ways that promote their WHOLE selves – however they please.
Just because we are pro-justice and liberation, doesn’t mean that we haven’t been handed a whole toolkit of oppressive systems we continue to run subconsciously.
I encourage you to practice curiosity. You never know what you might unearth, and who knows, like me, some of what you unearth may need to go to the compost bin!
For you curious people out there, who grew up in the hegemony of the Christian church, I ask you to consider this fabulous post created by @michealaatencio on IG
One of the greatest gifts we can offer the world is a curious mind and the ability to consider different perspectives.